I am outta here....I am leaving the UK on Thursday afternoon, bound for LA then Auckland, seven weeks there then off to Aussie for a party.....for a week for Howies 40th, back to Auckland for a night or two, then off back to LA and then home to the UK to go Elizabeth and Davids wedding....
Having to miss the JOG dinner is a real bummer, it is being held on Saturday night..all my crew will be there, I guess I will send them a text from the southern hemisphere where at least I will be dinning on fresh oysters and fish and basking the southern summer....lucky me.
It'll be great to do some sailing on the azul seas at home and catch up with old friends and family round the bbq's........and this will be my first hot Christmas for 9 years...I can't believe that time flys so quickly.
Monday, November 27, 2006
Monday, October 23, 2006
Mrs Rat Replies
{YOu need to read the one below this first}
Another great critter story
I received the following from the ‘ Radical Feminist Rats Collective’ (Brynderwyn Branch) I present it here in the interests of gender balance.
Well there I was, full term with the quins and he up and dies on me. I wouldn’t have worried, after all I’ve had eight husbands, and countless lovers, in my time, and he was far from the best of em. But he did bring in the odd dog biscuit and I’ll miss him round the place. Ya get hardened to it after a while. You see I’ve outlived all my partners, I’m a survivor I am. And bein one who takes her pleasure where I finds it, I don’t have no problems makin new friends. If yer takes my meanin.
A course I knew what was goin to happen I’s seen it all before. He began stayin out nights, reckoned he was just chewin the fat with his mates. He tried to hide it but when he’d finally get home, I could smell the warfarin on his breath. It’s a one way trip that stuff, never touch it meself, like I said I’m a survivor. I didn’t say nothin, but I knew he’d become a Talon addict and once they’ve got the habit the only way is down.
See I learnt early. Hadn’t long left home. Young and footloose, always out partying, livin the high life when one night I was hangin out in a kitchen pickin on crumbs and along comes this handsome young Rat. Boy was he somethin; filthy paws, lank matted fur, I wanted him real bad. Well we shared a couple of crumbs then he says,” Hey, I know where I can get a nice little bit of cheese, good vintage, great bouquet, what say I grab it and we head back to my place”? Now I don’t like to boast but I was a pretty dirty little Rat myself back then. “Don’t mind if I do,” I says. Well everthing was fine till he went to grab the cheese then, Bang! He was gone. Crushed right there in front of me. Gave me nightmares for weeks. Since then I know how to smell a human. Not every Rat’s that smart and they’ve taken a high toll on my friend and rallies. Nasty evil things humans, so we steal their food, chew holes in their ceilings and break into their cupboards. It’s our way of getting even; sometimes there’s even suicide missions to chew through electrical cables. We Rats are a dedicated bunch and we’ll win in the end.
For meself though, I’ve decided to move out of the house and take the kids to my summer residence in the bush. They’re too young yet to take part in the Rats Revolutionary Movement and it’s a safer place to raise the young rodents. But like I said, I’m a survivor and you can bet that come next winter I’ll be back up in the ceiling to renew my battle with the human foe, And hell, who knows? I might even have another partner by then.
Submitted by: The widow of Rattus Rattus.
Another great critter story
I received the following from the ‘ Radical Feminist Rats Collective’ (Brynderwyn Branch) I present it here in the interests of gender balance.
Well there I was, full term with the quins and he up and dies on me. I wouldn’t have worried, after all I’ve had eight husbands, and countless lovers, in my time, and he was far from the best of em. But he did bring in the odd dog biscuit and I’ll miss him round the place. Ya get hardened to it after a while. You see I’ve outlived all my partners, I’m a survivor I am. And bein one who takes her pleasure where I finds it, I don’t have no problems makin new friends. If yer takes my meanin.
A course I knew what was goin to happen I’s seen it all before. He began stayin out nights, reckoned he was just chewin the fat with his mates. He tried to hide it but when he’d finally get home, I could smell the warfarin on his breath. It’s a one way trip that stuff, never touch it meself, like I said I’m a survivor. I didn’t say nothin, but I knew he’d become a Talon addict and once they’ve got the habit the only way is down.
See I learnt early. Hadn’t long left home. Young and footloose, always out partying, livin the high life when one night I was hangin out in a kitchen pickin on crumbs and along comes this handsome young Rat. Boy was he somethin; filthy paws, lank matted fur, I wanted him real bad. Well we shared a couple of crumbs then he says,” Hey, I know where I can get a nice little bit of cheese, good vintage, great bouquet, what say I grab it and we head back to my place”? Now I don’t like to boast but I was a pretty dirty little Rat myself back then. “Don’t mind if I do,” I says. Well everthing was fine till he went to grab the cheese then, Bang! He was gone. Crushed right there in front of me. Gave me nightmares for weeks. Since then I know how to smell a human. Not every Rat’s that smart and they’ve taken a high toll on my friend and rallies. Nasty evil things humans, so we steal their food, chew holes in their ceilings and break into their cupboards. It’s our way of getting even; sometimes there’s even suicide missions to chew through electrical cables. We Rats are a dedicated bunch and we’ll win in the end.
For meself though, I’ve decided to move out of the house and take the kids to my summer residence in the bush. They’re too young yet to take part in the Rats Revolutionary Movement and it’s a safer place to raise the young rodents. But like I said, I’m a survivor and you can bet that come next winter I’ll be back up in the ceiling to renew my battle with the human foe, And hell, who knows? I might even have another partner by then.
Submitted by: The widow of Rattus Rattus.
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
The Rats Tale
Below is the second in the series of Country Critter stories written by CM Sellars...He is a friend of mine that lives on a mountain in New Zealand...
I guess I should say they are his copywrite and all that jazz....I would link to his webpage but he doesnt have one yet...that I know of.
Vee
The Rats Tale
The other day, when I was repapering the nest and I saw all those words written on the paper I thought to myself, “I wouldn’t mind having a go at this writing lark”. When I stopped for a breather and read some of the news articles it was pretty obvious that things generally were going to the Dogs. Made me glad to be a Rat. Although I admit dogs aren’t as bad as cats or humans they can still be pretty nasty, bite you as soon as look at you they will and if you’re a rodent like me, that can be serious. Well I got to thinking if dogs can do it, it should be a cinch for a crafty old Rat like me. Especially as I’ve been chewing through plenty of the classics lately. ( Tolstoy was palatable, the Bible proved that even rats don’t live on bread alone, but I’m afraid Kafka left a bitter after taste).
Us rats are pretty clever you know and my family’s well traveled. I’ve got cousins all over the world, in fact my uncle works in a cancer research laboratory in the U.S. A real cushy number, free accomodation, food and forty fags a day. Some rats have all the luck.
I prefer the simple life myself; the missus and me have lived most of our lives in the bush. It’s a great life, but sometimes you get a bit sick of the cold and damp and the moreporks can be a worry for any rodent spending nights outdoors. So when I heard there was a spot going up at the house; vacant recess in the ceiling, heating provided in the winter, always dry and as many dog biscuits as you can carry off without being caught. I jumped at the chance. But everything has its drawbacks. Firstly, there’s the Dog, not much of a problem really. Any rat with half a brain and a bit of experience can outsmart a Dog. Then there’s the man, he’s a damn nuisance, you’ve got to be on your guard the whole time.
Once he set one of those plastic traps, baited with cheese and bacon. I couldn’t resist, snap! It got me. Now you don’t spend most of your life in the bush without developing a few muscles and I was pretty angry. I pulled myself out of that trap before anyone had a chance to find me. Gave me a sore back for a week, but as they say, ‘what don’t kill you makes you stronger’, and smarter too. His next trick was an old gin trap he found in the shed. After taking off the rust then filing the mechanism to a hair trigger response. He set it on my pathway to the dog biscuits. Ha, what does he think I am, stupid? I had great fun setting that old trap off without getting caught then hiding to watch him come and check the sprung but empty trap muttering ‘bloody Rat’. All the while I’d be safe and sound up in the ceiling. Honestly I fair pissed myself. Really, you can still see the stain.
I reckon I’ve got him trained now though. Lately he’s been leaving food out for me, a sort of green barley, lovely stuff, even nicer than the soap in the bathroom. I’ve been eating it for a few days now and he keeps topping up the pile. I suppose it’s a peace offering on his part. So it looks like I got the last laugh eh?
Anyway I’d better let you go, I think a wee lie down is in order. I’m not feeling at all well today, bit of a guts ache. And I should take the chance while I’ve got it, you see the missus is in the family way, again!
Submitted by Rattus Rattus.
I guess I should say they are his copywrite and all that jazz....I would link to his webpage but he doesnt have one yet...that I know of.
Vee
The Rats Tale
The other day, when I was repapering the nest and I saw all those words written on the paper I thought to myself, “I wouldn’t mind having a go at this writing lark”. When I stopped for a breather and read some of the news articles it was pretty obvious that things generally were going to the Dogs. Made me glad to be a Rat. Although I admit dogs aren’t as bad as cats or humans they can still be pretty nasty, bite you as soon as look at you they will and if you’re a rodent like me, that can be serious. Well I got to thinking if dogs can do it, it should be a cinch for a crafty old Rat like me. Especially as I’ve been chewing through plenty of the classics lately. ( Tolstoy was palatable, the Bible proved that even rats don’t live on bread alone, but I’m afraid Kafka left a bitter after taste).
Us rats are pretty clever you know and my family’s well traveled. I’ve got cousins all over the world, in fact my uncle works in a cancer research laboratory in the U.S. A real cushy number, free accomodation, food and forty fags a day. Some rats have all the luck.
I prefer the simple life myself; the missus and me have lived most of our lives in the bush. It’s a great life, but sometimes you get a bit sick of the cold and damp and the moreporks can be a worry for any rodent spending nights outdoors. So when I heard there was a spot going up at the house; vacant recess in the ceiling, heating provided in the winter, always dry and as many dog biscuits as you can carry off without being caught. I jumped at the chance. But everything has its drawbacks. Firstly, there’s the Dog, not much of a problem really. Any rat with half a brain and a bit of experience can outsmart a Dog. Then there’s the man, he’s a damn nuisance, you’ve got to be on your guard the whole time.
Once he set one of those plastic traps, baited with cheese and bacon. I couldn’t resist, snap! It got me. Now you don’t spend most of your life in the bush without developing a few muscles and I was pretty angry. I pulled myself out of that trap before anyone had a chance to find me. Gave me a sore back for a week, but as they say, ‘what don’t kill you makes you stronger’, and smarter too. His next trick was an old gin trap he found in the shed. After taking off the rust then filing the mechanism to a hair trigger response. He set it on my pathway to the dog biscuits. Ha, what does he think I am, stupid? I had great fun setting that old trap off without getting caught then hiding to watch him come and check the sprung but empty trap muttering ‘bloody Rat’. All the while I’d be safe and sound up in the ceiling. Honestly I fair pissed myself. Really, you can still see the stain.
I reckon I’ve got him trained now though. Lately he’s been leaving food out for me, a sort of green barley, lovely stuff, even nicer than the soap in the bathroom. I’ve been eating it for a few days now and he keeps topping up the pile. I suppose it’s a peace offering on his part. So it looks like I got the last laugh eh?
Anyway I’d better let you go, I think a wee lie down is in order. I’m not feeling at all well today, bit of a guts ache. And I should take the chance while I’ve got it, you see the missus is in the family way, again!
Submitted by Rattus Rattus.
Thursday, June 22, 2006
mair is 30
We had a surprise party for Mair for her 30th Birthday at the Island sailing club, guess what the theme was?
Friday, June 09, 2006
Nab Tower Race Report
NAB TOWER
As ever, the JOG season for Team Whistler started with a trip up to Cowes, the crew house and then an evening imbibing the diet specially designed for optimal performance by our nutritional consultants - beer and kebabs.
A mystery ailment (possibly gin-related) laid low one of the team but hauled another friend from her bed (a restful Saturday vs. a day with Team Whistler - no decision!)
Despite a good early departure we didn't really get our run to the line timed and were still way off at the gun and near the back of the pack. Undeterred we settled down to the task in hand and started to work our way through the fleet, hugging the northern side of the deep water channel and heading for North Sturbridge to get a bit more tide. Electra dropped below us and then Imperator and Alchemist had a tussle, which let us through just before the forts - at the head of the fleet!
As regular readers of our reports will appreciate this put us in something of a strange situation, throwing our carefully planned navigational strategy (follow the leaders) into complete disarray! We surveyed the scene with the same emotion that Columbus must have felt as he set off across uncharted seas and, with a few whoops of joy, pressed on.
We hardened up (yes, it was that exciting) and headed for the Nab, verging on the edge of control but dropping off the desired line whilst Alchemist held up much better. Hard work and with a lot of flogging and near broaches; until suddenly BANG, the ring that the pole clips to on the mast snapped and the pole was flapping around, requiring a lot of shouting until it was reattached. upside down with the guy wrapped round it. more shouting, flapping and banging and it seemed that it was probably time to get the No:3 back up and head for the Tower just behind Alchemist. We went a little early and with the swell heaving us ominously toward the structure we had to tack again to round it, allowing Imperator through.
It was then time to settle down and sail for the forts, and enjoy the sensation of waving at friends in Class 4 as we went past (OK we had started 30 minutes earlier but it was a new experience!). We held our line well and picked through the moored vessels, whilst Manaru and Electra had to drop round the stern of one vessel (we did contemplate calling up the vessel and asking to ease more anchor chain to make life even more difficult for our friends!)
Back through the forts, tacking into to shallower water worked for Alchemist and Electra. For some reason we couldn't get both height and speed and even the unwitting help of a couple of Red Funnel ferries couldn't prevent both Electra and Imperator getting through us. hey ho - back to Cowes for more beer and kebabs!
As ever, the JOG season for Team Whistler started with a trip up to Cowes, the crew house and then an evening imbibing the diet specially designed for optimal performance by our nutritional consultants - beer and kebabs.
A mystery ailment (possibly gin-related) laid low one of the team but hauled another friend from her bed (a restful Saturday vs. a day with Team Whistler - no decision!)
Despite a good early departure we didn't really get our run to the line timed and were still way off at the gun and near the back of the pack. Undeterred we settled down to the task in hand and started to work our way through the fleet, hugging the northern side of the deep water channel and heading for North Sturbridge to get a bit more tide. Electra dropped below us and then Imperator and Alchemist had a tussle, which let us through just before the forts - at the head of the fleet!
As regular readers of our reports will appreciate this put us in something of a strange situation, throwing our carefully planned navigational strategy (follow the leaders) into complete disarray! We surveyed the scene with the same emotion that Columbus must have felt as he set off across uncharted seas and, with a few whoops of joy, pressed on.
We hardened up (yes, it was that exciting) and headed for the Nab, verging on the edge of control but dropping off the desired line whilst Alchemist held up much better. Hard work and with a lot of flogging and near broaches; until suddenly BANG, the ring that the pole clips to on the mast snapped and the pole was flapping around, requiring a lot of shouting until it was reattached. upside down with the guy wrapped round it. more shouting, flapping and banging and it seemed that it was probably time to get the No:3 back up and head for the Tower just behind Alchemist. We went a little early and with the swell heaving us ominously toward the structure we had to tack again to round it, allowing Imperator through.
It was then time to settle down and sail for the forts, and enjoy the sensation of waving at friends in Class 4 as we went past (OK we had started 30 minutes earlier but it was a new experience!). We held our line well and picked through the moored vessels, whilst Manaru and Electra had to drop round the stern of one vessel (we did contemplate calling up the vessel and asking to ease more anchor chain to make life even more difficult for our friends!)
Back through the forts, tacking into to shallower water worked for Alchemist and Electra. For some reason we couldn't get both height and speed and even the unwitting help of a couple of Red Funnel ferries couldn't prevent both Electra and Imperator getting through us. hey ho - back to Cowes for more beer and kebabs!
Water Butt
Bought this a few weeks ago at the local Garden Shop, and got the pump off Ebay, what a God Send, we have a hosepipe ban on as there is a drought
Summer is Here Yipee
This weeks been hectic, Last Weekend we had Round the Island Race, reported to be the largest one day Yacht regatta in the World. We came about 310th! You think that is mad! Well there were 1600 boats in the race, so to finish in the top quarter was pretty good we thought. Lack of wind mean't that nearly half the fleet retired from the race...as they couldn't get round the Needles before hitting the fowl tide..
So the B&B was of course full, then we had a Danish Crew in for the entire week, (they have left this morning) Quick change round of all the Linen for the third time this week, and now we are into Rock Festival Weekend! Whew! Monday got another big change again....another Pharmacy Regatta and the lot from Hot Dog and Mustard staying. One days grace and then the walkers arrive!!!
Blooming Spyware all over my computer driving me mad!!!!!!!!
So the B&B was of course full, then we had a Danish Crew in for the entire week, (they have left this morning) Quick change round of all the Linen for the third time this week, and now we are into Rock Festival Weekend! Whew! Monday got another big change again....another Pharmacy Regatta and the lot from Hot Dog and Mustard staying. One days grace and then the walkers arrive!!!
Blooming Spyware all over my computer driving me mad!!!!!!!!
Thursday, March 30, 2006
It's been a while
I know....I know, it's been a while since I was here, and life just seems to go on and on....
Had a big trip downunder for 2005/06. To be frank, I really didn't want to come back here to the UK, the weather down home was sensational, as were all the friends and family. I extended my intended trip to take in a regatta at the Bay of Islands.....what a great place...dolphins everyday and the last race day a pod followed us over the finish line.
The Bed and Breakfastis hotting up now with lots of bookings for the summer and the sailing season has already kicked off with us into the first JOGrace this Saturday out to the NAB TOWER and our 4th Winter Series Race on Sunday.....
The dog is hopefully pregnant and will be Whelping late May, fingers and paws Crossed. And the dafs have finally come out to play
Saturday, March 04, 2006
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